Brain Spillage #35: post..

my army of skanks :)

i just accomplished the impossible! i have graduated college!! i cant even believe it.

this last semester has been really difficult for me. for those who read my blog know i have been in a pretty dark space for a couple months, but graduating college and being able to spend more time with my friends has really helped pull me out of that. i can't begin to explain how blessed i am. just the fact that i am still alive and breathing despite everything that has happened in the last few months makes me so grateful. i am grateful to have my folks around and my amazing sister who has been my rock through everything. i'm not saying things are perfect, i still battle daily with this disease i was born with, but its def starting to come around.

i know part of living with clinical is being able to make the best out of the lows, and i have to say, this last bend was the worst. but now i feel like coming out of it is so much better than any of my other stabilized moments. i feel so amazing, like i can do anything. music and art have been in my mind a lot. i feel like i have so much inside of me i need to show the world. i cant just keep this to myself.

now, if you have ever had a serious convo with me, you know i hate fanatics. now, im not saying im becoming a fanatic, but a fan. God has really made himself present in my life these past few months, especially when i felt at my lowest. i know i wouldnt have been able to look on the bright side and actually graduate college without his mercy and grace. don't worry, you wont hear any sermons from me, but i will say that i def have a deeper appreciation for the One who gave everything for me and ive come to realize how weak i am without him. i owe him everything.

so, i am officially a college graduate. what are my plans now? who knows. grad school in a couple of years for sure..maybe a good job..traveling..gaining experience in my field. heck...maybe even dating. (wait...idk if im ready to retire my no dating policy...ahhhhh). anyways, we will see what happens. this is the beginning of a new adventure. one i plan to fill with awesome memories surrounded by the most amazing people. again, thank you to all my friends who have been there for me when times got difficult and helped pull me out of the hole instead of knocking me down further. i am truly grateful and i love you all very much.

someone get me an acoustic guitar!!

A.A.K.